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“I had to apologise to my children”

first_imgPrint WATCH: “Everyone is fighting so hard to get on” – Pat Ryan on competitive camogie squads Predictions on the future of learning discussed at Limerick Lifelong Learning Festival Facebook TAGSAdapt HouseDomestic abusefeaturedlimerick Twitter by Bernie [email protected] up for the weekly Limerick Post newsletter Sign Up “When I left him, I had to apologise to my kids for bringing them up in a place where their mother lived in terror. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life”.Those are the words of Limerick City woman, Deirdre, who left and abusive marriage after 25 years of being at the mercy of her husband’s absolute control and violent mood swings.“I never thought I was in an abusive relationship because he never laid a finger on me, Yet now I know that’s exactly what it was.I lived in fear of how he would be when he came through the door for all those years”.Deirdre was sharing her experience of escaping abuse during the international 16 days of opposition to violence against women.When Deirdre married, she had no idea what was ahead.“The first time I saw him carry on the way he did for most of our marriage was after our second child was born. He was hammering at something on the landing. It was late at night and a neighbour came in and asked me to ask him to stop the noise.“When I did, he threw the hammer at me from the top of the stairs”.“He was depressed and he would stay in bed for most of the day. But I had to listen for his every move and have a cup of tea ready, at drinkable temperature, when he finally came down the stairs. If it wasn’t how he liked it, he would throw it at me”.Deirdre says she lost her friends as she could never predict whether her husband would be gracious or insulting to them if they called. “I had no social life. He wanted to know where I was every minute of every day. If I went anywhere, he would call my mobile constantly and it had better be switched on”.A combination of depression and drink added fuel to her husband’s fire and the final straw came when their teenage son walked out of the house in the middle of the night after being roused by “roaring and shouting. He demanded we go after him and when we found my son, he hit him. That was the end for me. I realised that this wasn’t normal.”.Deirdre planned to use money she had stashed to accommodate her husband’s drinking to get away. She initially went to another part of the country and then was put in touch with Adapt services in Limerick.“I stayed with them for a few months and I can’t say enough about the support they gave me. When I wanted to talk, they were there. When I couldn’t talk about it, they were there too”.Deirdre has since moved back into the marital home that her husband left and has found a job.“I want women to know that just because they don’t have physical bruises doesn’t mean that they are not suffering abuse. But there is support and there is escape”, she said. Vanishing Ireland podcast documenting interviews with people over 70’s, looking for volunteers to share their stories WhatsApp Previous article€10 000 missing from Limerick PrisonNext articleOn Catching the Train Bernie Englishhttp://www.limerickpost.ieBernie English has been working as a journalist in national and local media for more than thirty years. She worked as a staff journalist with the Irish Press and Evening Press before moving to Clare. She has worked as a freelance for all of the national newspaper titles and a staff journalist in Limerick, helping to launch the Limerick edition of The Evening Echo. Bernie was involved in the launch of The Clare People where she was responsible for business and industry news. center_img News“I had to apologise to my children”By Bernie English – December 4, 2015 803 RELATED ARTICLESMORE FROM AUTHOR Limerick Ladies National Football League opener to be streamed live Advertisement Limerick’s National Camogie League double header to be streamed live Limerick Artist ‘Willzee’ releases new Music Video – “A Dream of Peace” Email Linkedinlast_img read more

MBB : ONE AT A TIME: Syracuse defeats Rutgers in overtime behind 34 made free throws

first_img Facebook Twitter Google+ Brandon Triche stepped to the free-throw line ‘half blind.’ With 28 seconds left in Syracuse’s eventual 84-80 overtime win over Rutgers on Saturday and SU up by four, Triche had a chance to virtually close out the victory.But a little more than three minutes earlier, Triche was poked in the eye by a Rutgers player. As a result, his contact popped out. He prepared to shoot with off-center vision. He looked at Rick Jackson, shaking his head and pointing to the eye.‘I was just telling Rick, ‘All right, man, I’m probably not going to hit rim on this one,” Triche said. ‘But when the first one went in, I was just trying to keep the same follow-through and shoot the same shot.’Triche sunk both, giving SU an 81-75 lead. He went 4-of-4 from the line ‘half blind’ and 9-of-9 overall. And his success was part of a recurring theme for the Orange.Syracuse (22-6, 9-6 Big East) stepped to the line a whopping 47 times Saturday in the Carrier Dome, far more than it has in any game all season. The Orange made 34 (72.3 percent) of those tries — many of which came in clutch, late-game situations and in an overtime full of free-throw attempts — to propel it to victory in front of 28,944 in the Dome.AdvertisementThis is placeholder textFor the worst free-throw shooting team in the Big East coming into Saturday’s game (64.9 percent), those shots from the line saved a second-half defensive breakdown. And though that breakdown resulted in an overtime session, free throws helped clinch the game there, too.‘Damn,’ SU guard Scoop Jardine said upon learning of SU’s 47 free-throw attempts. ‘We need to do that every game.’Getting to the line so much went hand in hand with Syracuse head coach Jim Boeheim’s offensive game plan: attack and drive to the basket.Through that attacking mentality, the Orange engaged in a fast-paced first half. Rutgers’ (13-13, 4-10) 44 points in the half were the most put up by any opponent SU has faced this season. Both teams shot better than 54 percent from the field.For SU, the offensive output was predicated on inside play and ball movement. Jackson had 11 points in the half. Drives from Kris Joseph and Jardine led to open 3-point opportunities or easy buckets down low. And the crisp passes also led to fouls, resulting in 16 first-half trips to the charity stripe.‘We kept attacking,’ SU forward C.J. Fair said. ‘We got good shots a lot. … Free throws are always a big key when we get to the line. We did a good job of hitting the free throws that we needed.’SU carried the game plan through to the second half, during which it built up a comfortable lead. But then came a defensive meltdown, caused by Jackson’s relegation to the bench after picking up four fouls. Rutgers scored on four of five possessions while he was out of the game as Jackson was replaced by freshman Baye Moussa Keita.An accompanying SU offensive drought helped Rutgers stay in the game as well. Syracuse didn’t score for more than four minutes after a putback by Fair gave SU a 64-56 lead.And after Rutgers’ Mike Coburn hit two free throws, SU found itself down 70-69. On the ensuing possession, Jackson stepped to the line near the end of another physical Big East game — the product of which sent him to the stripe with 9.9 seconds remaining. Jackson split the difference, tying the game.‘Once I missed (the first) one, I just wanted to make that one back,’ Jackson said. After James Beatty missed a 3-pointer on the other end, Syracuse entered its first overtime game of the season. Nine of SU’s 14 points in the extra session came via the free-throw line, including the clinching point.Calm, cool and collected, Joseph stepped to the free-throw line. It was a spot the Syracuse players were familiar with by the end of Saturday’s game.All that stood between uncertainty and a win was one made free throw to extend SU’s lead to two possessions. And as Joseph stepped to the line with five seconds left, he drained the first. Game over.‘It’s kind of muscle memory,’ Joseph said. ‘You just have to knock it down, have confidence. You want to be put in a situation like that if you’re a player who wants to make big plays.’[email protected] Commentscenter_img Published on February 18, 2011 at 12:00 pmlast_img read more